There’s a hidden understanding that we should constantly be focused on the next goal, the next achievement, the next accomplishment. Never satiated… always wanting more. This secret desire to want more and more and more dictates many of our actions – whether we realize it or not. Not so sure… let’s take a look. 

One of the top reasons for changing jobs is to earn more money. Most of us move to a new home because we want more space or something newer. We trade in perfectly good cars for newer models because we want the new gadgets… the bells and whistles. We shop BOGO deals because we get more, for the same amount of money.

Don’t get me wrong, all of these things are normal. We all want the best that we can afford and as much of it as we can get our hands on.

The looming question is: Is wanting more always a good thing? The answer might surprise you.

the cost of wanting more

We’re driven by consumption, which is fueled by our desire for more.

We’re women. We like nice things. We want the best for ourselves and our families and we’re targeted (heavily) by advertisers, constantly being marketed to. New, better, on sale, clearance… are all terms we’re all too familiar with.

Advertising has become the driving force behind many of our purchases, much of which is chalked up to impulsive spending. Marketers are smart. They make the decision easy for us with easy financing and credit card offers.

We often find ourselves financing what we can’t afford to outright purchase. Once it starts, it’s a terrible cycle. We use debt to accumulate things, things that we couldn’t afford without financing. In turn, having high credit card balances has a negative effect on our credit history. Maxxed out credit limits equals low credit scores. And, when it’s time to make a major well-throughout purchase we’re often in a frenzied state trying to repair credit fast so that we are able to buy a new home or car or start a new business.

It’s time to rethink how, why, and what we spend our money on.

overworking yourself is not impressive

How many times have you or someone you know stayed late at work, to get more done?

If you work in an office, you’re one of the biggest offenders. Most office workers work an additional 10-20 hours/week in overtime. No wonder so many companies prefer to offer you a salary package over hourly pay.

While there are ways to get more done in less time by improving your productivity and time management, we all have a daily threshold. Your productivity is limited. It’s why we have to take breaks throughout the day. You need mental (and physical) rest.

It’s also important that you are implementing self-care and finding a good work/life balance to live a full life. Remember, you’re only one person. You’re not a machine, and to be your best (even at work) you need time to rest and enjoy yourself. 

be sure you have a tribe and not just a lot of ‘friends’

Wanting more friends is a good thing.

We should all be surrounded by a tribe of women that want the best for us. Forming real connections and building strong friendships can be life changing but don’t confuse building your real life tribe with accumulating followers and friends on social media. 

Think about it this way, when you really stop and take time to understand the value of Facebook friends, you may realize that all that time you spend posting, commenting, liking, and reading other people’s posts, could be better spent interacting with your real friends. In fact, research suggests that people struggle to maintain more than 150 friendships in real life. Imagine if you tried to really engage and interact with the thousands of social media connections that you have. 

What’s important is that you find the balance. Sure social media provides a platform of expression and a place for you to share your life and perspective… just don’t let it become your only interaction with those you love. Status updates can’t replace Sunday brunch and bottomless mimosas with your real friends.

5 signs it's time for a mental break Tiffany Nicole Forever Blog

just one more… is the worst phrase of all time

We all want a little pick me up at the end of the day. 

For some, it’s a sweet treat, a slice of cake, a pint of ice cream… a little chocolate. For others, it’s a glass of wine or a large hot-n-ready pizza. Most of our end of the day indulgences are triggered because we’re stressed, or tired, or just need a mental escape and for some of us, food is that escape!

The problem emerges when you lack self-control with certain things and your indulgence quickly becomes an over-indulgence.

For example, I love Mexican food. I can eat Mexican food every day of my life and I’ve learned that if I’m stressed out, I tend to order and eat a lot more than my body can handle. It’s my unhealthy pick-me-up. Since I recognize this, and I’m trying to lose a little weight, I know how to pull myself back from making a bad choice. I usually try to eat a quick snack and drink a bottle of water before I order.

This may seem a bit extreme but I’m being real with myself about my unhealthy habit. I’ve implemented a system that helps me avoid doing something that I will definitely regret and I’m working with the notion that less is more. Or in this case, less is enough.

It’s important to me that I avoid co-dependent tendencies. I don’t want food, sugar, or alcohol to become my emotional support or comfort. I’d rather use precautions and avoid feeling bad about it later.  

For you, it may be something different.

You may spend so much time relaxing after work that you neglect other responsibilities around the house. It could be any different variation of overindulgence. It’s up to you take some time to see what you’re doing too much of and evaluate if it’s worth it and if it’s in line with your vision for your life. If it’s not, create a plan of action – even if it means eating a snack before ordering Mexican food to-go and saving yourself some calories and a possible stomachache.