Secrets to Self-Care
As I write this, I am secluded to my bed, sick with flu-like symptoms. I’ve been in the same spot for four days now; and to be honest, I’m completely over it! But, I must admit, this time of quiet (and misery) has given me the opportunity to reflect and think through how I currently take care of myself and the importance of self-care.
Before this little ‘bug’ snuck up on me, I was crushing my to-do list. I was making great strides in my business and I had finally found my momentum. All that changed in an instant. One minute, I was having lunch with my husband and the next, I had a sore and tightening throat. That uncomfortable sore throat quickly became a full-blown illness. It included the works – from body aches and congestion to a mild cough and complete exhaustion. My eyes itched and I had a pressure headache that nothing seemed to help. I was so overwhelmed with symptoms that I wasn’t getting any rest and thinking clearly was out of the question. I had been knee-deep in work and I hadn’t left the house in days, so I had no idea how I found myself this sick so quickly.
The worse it got, the more I had to acknowledge that I was vulnerable because I hadn’t been taking care of myself. I had neglected my health and while eating right and working out won’t completely eliminate your chances of getting sick, it will bolster your immune system and help you combat the things that you can’t control (like the flu).
I realized that taking care of me, was even more important than getting things done. There was no way that I could have one without the other. That’s the part that’s often overlooked. We may think that we are ‘doing okay’ or ‘getting by’, without really caring for our bodies, our minds and, our spirit; but it will catch up to us.
Whether you find yourself burnt out, feeling tired, overly stressed out or you experience sickness or a major health scare – the lack of attention that we show ourselves will show up, just as it did this time for me. So here I sit, with finally enough energy to pen this post, realizing that I too need a self-care regimen… now, more than ever!
What is self-care?
Self-care is simply taking care of YOU. It’s a concept based on the belief that through actions and targeted behaviors we can strengthen and nourish our bodies, experience less stress and anxiety, and refresh/renew our spirit. That setting aside time that is focused on your overall wellness is essential to maintaining energy, improving your moods, and creating overall health.
There are three elements to total self-care: Body, Mind, and Spirit
Body
When you create habits that are focused on your physical well-being, you make your health a priority. You start to put yourself first. In order to properly care for your body, you have to take action… literally.
If you’re like me, you know the importance of exercise, but cringe at the thought of the pain associated with a new workout routine. But, let’s be honest, the benefits of an active lifestyle, outweigh any initial discomfort. Exercise can boost your immune system, increase endorphins, and decrease stress. Sounds too good to be true? It’s not. But you have to be committed to fully experience all of the benefits.
My suggestion: Start Slow. Successfully create a daily regimen by doing something that you know you can do every day; for example: a daily 30-minute walk – that progressively increases to an hour or a 30 minute Zumba DVD Workout. The more convenient it is for you, in the beginning, the more likely you will stick to it!
Taking care of your body is a little more than just what you do… it’s also what you consume.
What we eat is often associated with weight loss, but eating well is not just about losing weight. Food has the ability to affect your mood, concentration, energy, hormone levels, and even the way your organs function. Even though I knew this, the more I immersed myself in learning how various foods affected my body, the more I understood the true importance of eating right. There is a direct correlation to what we eat and how our bodies perform!
We often see the way we think and feel as separate from the foods that we consume, but the mind and body are one. Click To TweetWe often see the way we think and feel as separate from the foods that we consume, but the mind and body are one. Think about how you feel after you eat certain not-so-good-for-you-foods. Some foods can leave you feeling exhausted, while others can affect your ability to focus.
Paying attention to what we eat is an important component of caring for our bodies. To get a clear picture of how what we eat affects us we should keep a food diary. Document everything that you are consuming and then, pay close attention to how you feel.
Tip: Keep it simple. Grab a small pocket size notebook or download an easy to use app (I suggest My Fitness Pal) and get started.
Mind
If I asked someone what they do regularly to nourish their mind, I would probably get a blank stare in response. Think about that. We all know someone that practices yoga or never misses a weekly massage appointment. Even though those activities are excellent for your mental and emotional state of mind, we don’t usually directly associate them with mental health. But we should.
Creating habits that are designed to calm your emotions, elevate your mood, and balance out your emotions, can be just what you need to gain clarity and focus in your life. Click To TweetCreating habits that are designed to calm your emotions, elevate your mood, and balance out your emotions, can be just what you need to gain clarity and focus in your life. Start by implementing activities that cost you nothing, but have a great impact on your mental state and attitude:
1 – Journal
Reflecting on how you feel and why you feel that way can be very therapeutic. Writing down experiences that cause heightened emotion (both, good and bad), can help us to identify and eliminate triggers or agitators in our lives.
Tip: Keep your journal by your bed or by the coffee machine, so that you are prompted to do it each day – before bed or first thing in the morning!
2 – Soak
We are always on the go and showering is the fastest way to clean up quick and keep it moving. Try incorporating a relaxing bath experience a few times per week. It will help to relieve tension in the body and put you in a relaxed state.
Tip: Add a bath bomb, relaxing candle and your favorite music to enhance your private time.
3 – Solitude
Put your cell phone on do-not-disturb and find a good book to read, spend some time in meditation or prayer.
Tip: If you’re easily distracted use this time to focus on something specific, like watching the sun rise or set, or listening to an audio book.
Spirit
Whether you consider yourself religious or not, spiritual self-care should be a priority in your life. This element is not so black and white. Only you can define what helps you feel connected to a higher power. As you’re thinking through the activities that you want to incorporate, don’t limit yourself to what works for others. For you, this may mean regular prayer time, daily meditation, creating a daily affirmation, volunteering to help those in need, maintaining a gratitude journal, or being a part of a local place of worship. The main thing is to remember that there is no right or wrong way to nourish your spirituality. However, any habits that you create should bring you a greater since of being and connection to your purpose.
Self-care is not doing one thing or another. It’s about developing a lifestyle where you are consistently setting aside time to care for YOU – body, mind and spirit. Initially, if you’re not used to it, it may take some effort to create a regimen solely focused on you. Don’t worry, in time, it will become second nature – a regular part of who you are.
Self-care is not doing one thing or another, it’s more about developing a lifestyle where you are consistently setting aside time to care for YOU – body, mind, and spirit. Click To TweetRemember: To do your best, give your best or be your best self, you have to incorporate habits that support and nurture your overall well-being. Take some time to find the self-care techniques that are the best fit for your life.
Taking care of yourself is so important! You can’t fill up someone else’s tank when you’re running on empty!
Jasmine – You make the best point: You can’t give out what you don’t have!
Such an important message to share! So many of us, especially women, don’t take the time to care for ourselves.
Sara – Yes!!! Often times we spend so much time caring for others that we forget or neglect caring for ourselves. But we’re so much better when we put ourselves first.
Great post to share with us all as a reminder for ourselves!
So glad you liked this post. I suffer often from remembering to care for myself and I also know others that do the same. I’m learning to put myself first and I’m better for it.
Taking care of yourself is especially hard for mothers because our most important job is to take care of our children. But you’re right. It is extremely important for us to be healthy and well before we can take good care of others. Thanks for the reminder!
Pamela – I agree. As a mother of four, I have spent my entire adult life making sure that others needs were met, but when I fail to care for myself – even in the simple ways – I’m no good to anybody. I’ve learned to appreciate myself, knowing that I can’t contribute to the well being of my family, if I don’t do the same for myself.
I love the listen to an audio book tip. I don’t always have the time to get comfy and read plus i feel lazy if i do but if i listen to an audio book it would still feel like i was relaxing whilst being able to respond to the outside world quickly if required and without to much effort.
Absolutely Breharne! I only recently started listening to audio books – and while the voices can take a little getting used to – it has been completely worth it! There are books that I couldn’t find time to sit and read, that I’ve been able to listen to in the shower or while I’m folding clothes. If you’ve never tried Audible… I do suggest trying it. Here’s a (affiliate) link (that will also get you two free audio books and completely FREE 30 day trial) http://amzn.to/2bVi5eQ – I did this first to make sure that I liked the idea of listening to audiobooks.
Love that you break down self-care into actionable things to do! Self-care is really about taking care of the whole person. You can’t care for one aspect of yourself. It has to be everything!
Melanie – I completely agree. It’s easy for women to think that going to get a manicure is self-care, and while it is one small component of it, it doesn’t address everything. The best way to make sure that your practicing Total Self-care is to plan and schedule time just for you!
There is some seriously great advice here, and packaged in a way that is not overwhelming but inviting – I can do this! I’ve blogged about what happened to me when I forgot about self-care in the haze of taking care of others – it was not pretty. Like the first comment – I just don’t have the strength or the tools to give my best to others when I’m not giving it to myself!
Megan – I’m going to check out your blog. I’m sure that I’ve had similar experiences… which is what brought me to writing this post. Chronic burnout, mental fog and irritability are some of the symptoms I get when I’m not caring for myself properly.
Journaling and quiet time are my favorite ways to take care of myself. If I don’t get that time in for myself, I feel lost (and grumpy). Really great tips. Sharing!
Jennifer – I’m so happy that you enjoyed the post. Journaling is so therapeutic for me. I find that when I’m not journaling regularly I can feel overwhelmed.
This is soooo important!!! We get too consumed with the “what needs and dos” of our everyday life that we forget to just listen to our body and take the time to nourish it (mentally and physically!). Thanks so much for sharing this, this is my second day with a wicked migraine (that caused me to call out from work today) perhaps I should listen and do as my body needs <3
OMG Melissa, I suffer from migraines too and they definitely become more frequent and painful when I’m not taking good care of myself. The “what needs and dos” of life will always be there but if we don’t care for ourselves properly, we won’t be able to handle them effectively anyway.
Self-care is big on my list! I have suffered with anxiety and migraines for the majority of my life, and I have just discovered ways to make it all manageable. Solitude for me is key, as well as writing. A healthy meal also goes a long way to feeling great. Thank you for sharing this information! I really enjoyed it!
So true! But it is so hard to do when you are smashing your goals! This just reminds me why I need to get in the bed and get some rest! Having a great routine is a big part of this also.